Ah the 80's, those were the days. This piece made me absolutely howl - mostly with pain as I could relate so much 🙈 But I mean, if there's a way of dressing to attract Golden Retrievers, I'm all for it!
Fiona what a brilliant read. I loved this and loved the flashback photos! I’m a millennial and very much grew up with magazines telling me how I should dress, how I should act all for the male gaze. I bloody admire the women growing up today who are unapologetically themselves and can call out toxic culture.
Glad you enjoyed, thank you! I do too - I am in awe of them! All those old 'rules' have been thrown out. I know the internet was the main factor in all but killing off women's magazines - but I wonder if this has played a part too? Young women just don't want that kind of prescriptive content?
Brilliant! Chortling at this so much! How much of the night did we spend waiting to see ‘if he would look over’ 😂 someone got up so I could sit down at the subway platform at St.Enoch’s today. Must have looked like I needed it! 😂😂x
OHHH this made me laugh this morning and my head was flooded with smells and memories. Sun-In, Immac, my sister's Opium perfume, perm lotion, Body Shop soaps, lots of back-combing, mullets and oversized waistcoats bought from secondhand shops, thin black rubber bracelets mixed with silver-coloured bangles and fingerless gloves. We WERE hot stuff. Living for the slow-sets where a snog could last three songs - Stairway to Heaven and a bad kisser was a lethal combination. My dream guy would have been in a shiny grey Miami Vice suit with a pink shirt but he never manifested.
I couldn't believe there were no slow sets anymore when my daughter started going out - she'd never experience the angst and anticipation that made up my teenage years.
Thanks Rosie - glad you enjoyed! OMG the slow set. The one and only time I was ever 'asked' (having being noticed!!) was in a youth club disco somewhere near Kilmarnock. The song was Babe by Styx. I still go a bit funny when I hear it... x
Oh this is just hilarious. We did all (sort of) like being whistled at by builders hanging from scaffolding. I don’t miss all the effort and discomfort put into dressing for the male gaze either… but I confess to thinking that the
occasional appreciation from the chaps in overalls up ladders would be welcome in these days of invisibility. Actually , a man said ´hello beautiful’ at the 202 bus stop the other night to me - at least it must have been me as there was no one else at the bus stop… and I wondered if he wanted to steal my carrier bags full of Sainsbury’s shopping. If he’d stolen my ‘taste the difference’ hummus I would have been furious. Lastly, I would never walk past a lone man at a bus stop and say ‘alright handsome’ … but maybe i should.
Hello beautiful at the bus stop! I can picture you gripping your shopping bags a little more tightly. Have a vague memory on more! magazine of us sending a female writer (Suzanne Power?) out onto the streets to wolf whistle and catcall at men and report on the 'results.' ELLO GORGEOUS!
I saw a cute toddler the other day, we made eye contact and I said 'hello aren't you cute' or words to that effect, the Dad said 'thank you very much' as if I said it to him and we both laughed (to be fair he was quite cute) It was a nice interaction. I'm in my mid 40s now and am loving not being so concerned about the Male Gaze. Or anyone's gaze, for that matter.
So funny 🤣 This reminds me of the time someone offered me their seat on a crowded train.. I wasn't old or disabled.. what was their reasoning? Then I realised.. they thought I was pregnant.. I wasn't, I was just really bloated from eating ALL the bread on my recent holiday! 🙈🤣Just pre-ordered your book.. sounds fab! 👍
Is this similar to our AquaNet over here across the pond? YES TO AQUANET 😆😂😆😂 it was weirdly sticky and had a specific scent. In fact, AquaNet And Cigarettes instantly reminds me of my grandma.
We had Aquanet in the UK back then too. I think it was the combo with cigarettes that did for it. Sprayed on liberally it was highly combustible when the user lit a cigarette!
Funny. I got sick of attracting the male gaze by the time I was 18. Yes, the first few times men noticed me as a 14 year old I was flattered, but it was always the wrong kind of men, never the ones I fancied. Plus soon it started getting annoying and at times, creepy. One of the great benefits of ageing, as a woman, is getting less visible to men. I really enjoy your humour.
A brilliant but also cringeworthy read from someone who also grew up reading Jackie magazine and whose one desire when dressing to go out was to attract boys. How could we be so pathetic but I guess we just never questioned it. Total admiration for the girls of today
Ah the 80's, those were the days. This piece made me absolutely howl - mostly with pain as I could relate so much 🙈 But I mean, if there's a way of dressing to attract Golden Retrievers, I'm all for it!
Haha - me too! I love them! Comfy hairy sweaters, perhaps? x
Yeah, that could work 😂
Fiona what a brilliant read. I loved this and loved the flashback photos! I’m a millennial and very much grew up with magazines telling me how I should dress, how I should act all for the male gaze. I bloody admire the women growing up today who are unapologetically themselves and can call out toxic culture.
Glad you enjoyed, thank you! I do too - I am in awe of them! All those old 'rules' have been thrown out. I know the internet was the main factor in all but killing off women's magazines - but I wonder if this has played a part too? Young women just don't want that kind of prescriptive content?
oh my the smell of immac!
GAG!!! Why did we do that to ourselves? x
Once was enough for me and I returned to my dad’s orange bic razors!
Haha that's great! I've been there too! The guy offering you his seat is just perfect 🤣
I was sort of... gutted! xx
Brilliant! Chortling at this so much! How much of the night did we spend waiting to see ‘if he would look over’ 😂 someone got up so I could sit down at the subway platform at St.Enoch’s today. Must have looked like I needed it! 😂😂x
I know - it was insane really. But also, it was part of the thrill of the night and weirdly enjoyable xx
Are we certain that Teabag Boy wasn’t dressing to attract the male gaze as well? (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
That's entire possible Dan, now I think of it!
Properly chortling, Fi. "Is he looking at me NOW"
He STILL isn't Wendy! Whaaaa! xx
Me neither. Give me the gaze of likeminded women who no longer give a toss about the male gaze any day!
Yes! What a blessed relief to be at this stage of life. (But... is he looking yet?!)
OHHH this made me laugh this morning and my head was flooded with smells and memories. Sun-In, Immac, my sister's Opium perfume, perm lotion, Body Shop soaps, lots of back-combing, mullets and oversized waistcoats bought from secondhand shops, thin black rubber bracelets mixed with silver-coloured bangles and fingerless gloves. We WERE hot stuff. Living for the slow-sets where a snog could last three songs - Stairway to Heaven and a bad kisser was a lethal combination. My dream guy would have been in a shiny grey Miami Vice suit with a pink shirt but he never manifested.
I couldn't believe there were no slow sets anymore when my daughter started going out - she'd never experience the angst and anticipation that made up my teenage years.
Thanks Rosie - glad you enjoyed! OMG the slow set. The one and only time I was ever 'asked' (having being noticed!!) was in a youth club disco somewhere near Kilmarnock. The song was Babe by Styx. I still go a bit funny when I hear it... x
Oh this is just hilarious. We did all (sort of) like being whistled at by builders hanging from scaffolding. I don’t miss all the effort and discomfort put into dressing for the male gaze either… but I confess to thinking that the
occasional appreciation from the chaps in overalls up ladders would be welcome in these days of invisibility. Actually , a man said ´hello beautiful’ at the 202 bus stop the other night to me - at least it must have been me as there was no one else at the bus stop… and I wondered if he wanted to steal my carrier bags full of Sainsbury’s shopping. If he’d stolen my ‘taste the difference’ hummus I would have been furious. Lastly, I would never walk past a lone man at a bus stop and say ‘alright handsome’ … but maybe i should.
Hello beautiful at the bus stop! I can picture you gripping your shopping bags a little more tightly. Have a vague memory on more! magazine of us sending a female writer (Suzanne Power?) out onto the streets to wolf whistle and catcall at men and report on the 'results.' ELLO GORGEOUS!
I saw a cute toddler the other day, we made eye contact and I said 'hello aren't you cute' or words to that effect, the Dad said 'thank you very much' as if I said it to him and we both laughed (to be fair he was quite cute) It was a nice interaction. I'm in my mid 40s now and am loving not being so concerned about the Male Gaze. Or anyone's gaze, for that matter.
Oh that IS cute! That is a meet cute in a film! x
So funny 🤣 This reminds me of the time someone offered me their seat on a crowded train.. I wasn't old or disabled.. what was their reasoning? Then I realised.. they thought I was pregnant.. I wasn't, I was just really bloated from eating ALL the bread on my recent holiday! 🙈🤣Just pre-ordered your book.. sounds fab! 👍
Haha post holiday bread-bloat - LOVE it. But at least you got a seat x (And thanks so much for pre-ordering - hope you enjoy!) xx
Da Vinci’s! I remember it well 😄
I worked in a kebab van parked across the road when I was at art college, heady days 😄
I remember going to a shoe shop in St Andrews with my sister and we were remarking on how comfy the shoes looked!
I love clothes and fashion but it’s very freeing to dress for my own gaze 👍
It really is! And I wonder if our paths crossed?! When were you at art school in Dundee?
Good to see you too used an entire can of Silvikrin hair spray on a night out back then. I think we may have shared a hairdresser! 😂😂😂
Yes - the unyielding helmet of crispness days! Loved it!
Is this similar to our AquaNet over here across the pond? YES TO AQUANET 😆😂😆😂 it was weirdly sticky and had a specific scent. In fact, AquaNet And Cigarettes instantly reminds me of my grandma.
We had Aquanet in the UK back then too. I think it was the combo with cigarettes that did for it. Sprayed on liberally it was highly combustible when the user lit a cigarette!
We lived dangerously back then! EVERYTHING - even our bed 'linen' - was highly flammable. I can feel an idea for a column brewing...
I suspect so Shelly - a highly effective hairspray (I don't think I've used hairspray in 35 years) in a big gold can - iconic, THE spray to use
Funny. I got sick of attracting the male gaze by the time I was 18. Yes, the first few times men noticed me as a 14 year old I was flattered, but it was always the wrong kind of men, never the ones I fancied. Plus soon it started getting annoying and at times, creepy. One of the great benefits of ageing, as a woman, is getting less visible to men. I really enjoy your humour.
Thank you Ros! And I agree totally. Who wants to be perved at, really? I wish I hadn't cared back then!
A brilliant but also cringeworthy read from someone who also grew up reading Jackie magazine and whose one desire when dressing to go out was to attract boys. How could we be so pathetic but I guess we just never questioned it. Total admiration for the girls of today
Oh I agree. I'd love to give my 17 year old self a gentle shake and a mega dose of self confidence!
Oh God. I hate to think how much Elnett I inhaled.
I can still feel it in my lungs 😄